Broken Glass, Broken Hearts part 65

It was an unbelievably freeing feeling, knowing that Tyler knew. Knowing now that all the parts of my life- no matter how damaged those parts may be- were connected. I could feel Dustin sitting behind me, brushing my hair with her fingers and whispering that everything was going to be all right. I could call Tyler and hear his calming voice, so happy to hear mine. I was so miserable, separated from two of the most important people in my life.

And yet I was so joyful, because I knew that all was right with us again.

The weather started to clear up a couple weeks after the dance. It had been foggy for a couple months now, but as the summer drew closer, the whisper of sun promised to come soon. This put Sadie in a good mood, with even more energy than she commonly had, but I had mixed emotions. I didn't mind the fog, but sun was nice, too, so I didn't really have any opinion as far as the weather went. The actual thought of summer was what I was nervous about. Of course I was glad to have the year over with, that was a given. But my mom had come into my room a couple days ago and given me a piece of information that made me both extremely miserable and wonderfully ecstatic at the same time.

We were moving.

That much we were sure of. My mom had thought that this place was the one, that we were going to stay here. Neither Milly nor I were surprised when that turned out to be wrong. So we were definitely moving, we just weren't positive yet where.

The first option my mother had given me was the option that had filled me with overwhelming excitement. She had taken a liking to the area where my grandmother lived when she visited her there occasionally. "I don't know why I didn't think of it in the first place," she said to me, grinning, "I could have just gotten a house there, and then you kids wouldn't have had to leave your friends. Such a shame that it hadn't crossed me mind." Shame, indeed. If that was all she had said to me, I would have been bouncing up in down in my seat waiting for summer to arrive, counting the hours until I was able to be with Angela again.

But that wasn't all she said. "Now," she had said to me, "I know this doesn't sound good now, but you should really consider it. It's a wonderful place, and it would be such a different experience living there. It could really turn your life around." What was that supposed to mean? Did my life need to be turned around? "We could move back to grandma's little town, or we could move to New York." The feeling of ecstasy that had been forming in me plummeted in that moment, and my face fell to a blank slate, emotionless. My heart was beating double-time. The worst part, however, was not that I had to wait for my mom to make the decision, that I had to sit, tapping my foot on the floor, waiting for the single most indecisive woman in the world to make the decision that could either make or break my entire world.

The worst part was not that.

The worst part was that she left the decision up to me.

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