I found my hands shaking slightly as I stepped onto the stage, and I hated myself for it– what did I care what these people thought about me?– but I couldn't stop.
The clipboard woman looked at me, then back to her clipboard, at which point she read aloud my name and the the name of the monologue I would be reading. I was silent for a beat after she finished, and she looked up at me with a raised eyebrow and said, "Well, let's hear it, then, shall we?" I blushed, nodded, and began. The clipboard woman paused twice in her furious note-taking to just stare at me as I spoke, and both times I felt my cheeks turn red and heard my voice falter slightly. When I finished, I stood in silence, not sure exactly what to do next. Clipboard woman looked up at me and asked, "Will you be performing a song?" I blinked, I hadn't knownnot performing was an option. I immediately jumped on the opportunity, replying in a hurried tone, "Um, no."
"All right, then." Clipboard woman looked up at me from over her glasses, "Thank you." I took her hint and hurried back down the steps, returning to my previous seat behind Skinny Bones Joan.
"You should have sung," Joan informed me, "Your chances of getting in are much higher if you sing."
"Not for me, believe me."
"That bad?"
"I couldn't kill passing animals or anything, but I'm not particularly pleasant on the ears." Joan laughed and held out one of her spider-like limbs to me, "I'm Nicole." I took her tiny hand, feeling like a giant as my fingers collapsed over hers, "Vera. Nice to meet you." Nicole nodded in agreement and climbed over the seats, falling into the chair next to me. "So can you sing?" I asked conversationally, watching another auditionee who stood with a straight back, his chin higher than Mt. Everest as he recited his lines. I glanced at my cell phone as I pulled it from my pocket and wondered when would be an appropriate time to leave; if I had any further obligations here for the day. Nicole shrugged, "I dunno. I guess." A text from Caleb came in, and I opened it.
r u going to rachels tonight
I pressed the reply button and responded in the affirmative. Nicole shot a glance at my phone as another text came in,
ill giv u a ride. u home?
I responded again, this time negatively.
where r u? u want me to come get u now or later?
I looked over to Nicole, who was not subtly reading over my shoulder, and asked, "Do we need to stay any longer?"
"I do," she said, "My ride hasn't auditioned yet. You, on the other hand, are as free as a bird."
im at Ralph's. now
Nicole raised an eyebrow at my text, and I smiled at her. "Nice to meet you, Nicole. I'll see you at...callbacks?" She shook her head, "Nah, either you're in or you're out for this one."
"All right, then I'll see you at practice, hopefully." Not hopefully. I was hoping she was right about my not singing lowering my chances of getting in, actually. "Yea, see you," she said, turning back towards the stage. I stepped out of the row and looked at my phone as I walked towards the double doors in the back.
on my way
© 2012
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