Broken Glass, Broken Hearts part 106

"Oh, Angela," I said, laughing, "I love you, you know that?" I kept laughing, but when she went silent, I glanced over at her. "Something ails you?" I asked casually, an eyebrow raised. She was staring up at the ceiling still, but now her eyes were wide. "Um," she said. She glanced at me. "You...um..." She blinked, her mouth open to continue, but she said nothing else. She looked away from me, back up at the tired little ceiling. She closed her mouth, and said nothing else. I waited a moment before inquiring, "I...?" She shook her head, but still didn't meet my eye. "Forget it," she said. She laughed slightly, nervously, "Never mind." I furrowed my eyebrows and shook my head, "Indeed I shall mind," I contradicted, "What were you going to say?" Her face went blank for another moment, and then, right when I was going to open my mouth to insist she continue again, she blurted out, "You love me?" Now it my turn to blink. "Oh," I said. I laughed, sort of nervously, trying desperately not to look away from her face. "Um," I swallowed slightly, and then laughed at myself. I nodded, smiling nervously, "Um, yup. Sure do." She blinked at me, and then her eyes widened more. She looked back up at the ceiling.

"Oh," she said.

And that was all she said.

He had said he loved me, just like that, casually, as if it was given. If he had said it to me when we were kissing, if he sent it in a card, if he had whispered it to me over my shoulder as I emptied my books out of my locker, I might not have believed him. But he hadn't said it in any of those ways, he hadn't planned it, hadn't led up to it, hadn't even made a split-second decision to say it. He'd simply known it was true, and had said it casually, in the same manner you might say, "It's cloudy out today." It was a fact, and he stating it. He didn't need to embellish it or feel nervous about expressing it. It was just truth.

"Maybe she was just in shock. Girls always make a big deal out of the first 'I love you', or whatever. Maybe she was shocked speechless," my dad said, dipping another chip into the guacamole. I shook my head, "Maybe the words were new, but she knew that they were true before I said them. She might have been surprised to hear them vocalized, but not enough that she wouldn't respond."

"She did respond."

"Not exactly satisfactorily." My dad laughed slightly and shrugged, flipping a three over and sighing as he pulled back the cards, adding it to his steadily-growing pile. "You suck at this game," I stated, biting into a chip. "Gee, thanks for the memo," he replied. I laughed and flipped another card, and he sighed again and said, "When I first told your mom, do you know what she said?" I shook my head and glanced up at him, slightly nervous. He laughed, "She said, 'Well, duh, who doesn't?'" I laughed outright, "Oh, man. That must have sent your self-esteem sky-rocketing." He laughed and shook his head. He smiled at the cards as he continued, "She said that, but I saw, in those freakishly blue eyes you all have-" he stopped to grin, slightly bashfully, at me- "I saw that she was caught off-guard, just like your girl. I saw that she was nervous." Now his grin grew to one of confidence, and it was as if the scene was playing out right before me. "And you know what, son, you better remember that nervousness, with girls, is always a good sign. Remember that, because it's true for males, too, and the girls sure as sure remember it." I laughed, and he picked up again, "So I saw the nervousness, and I said to her, 'You love me too.'" He smiled at my raised eyebrow."Yes, I did," he assured me, "And you know what she said? 'Yea, guess I do.'" I laughed and flipped another card, forcing my dad to take the pile of cards again. He groaned, and I smiled at the floor. How did this happen, exactly? How did I come to asking my dad about girl advice?

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